Kouma Koura

Working night shifts is rarely fun. Some nights are not as bad as others, but for the most part I would say that I don't like working night shifts. Honestly, who would voluntarily work 17 hours straight, from 3 pm until 8 am the next morning taking care of 23 patients all by themself and actually enjoy it? Maybe I paint too dark a picture. I shouldn't complain because it's usually not that bad; it's just not something I look forward to.

In any case, I'm pretty sure that last night (Thursday night) was one of the most miserable night shifts that I've worked yet. It's funny because when I was getting on work, I had a feeling that things would not be good when the nursing student began giving me report because the actual nurse was busy with maternity patient, especially when I asked him questions about the patients and he repeatedly responded with an irritated, "I don't know." It also didn't help knowing that the two people I was scheduled to work with both had malaria. Emily ended up not working because she felt so awful, which left me and Augustin, who was feeling much better than the day before when he was getting IV Quinine.

By the time I had gotten report on all the patients, it was already 4 pm, and they were lots of problems to solve. Two IVs needed to be restarted, some patients had just gotten out of surgery and the family wanted explanations on how to give the medicines, one patient's blood sugar was in the 500s and the insulin was locked in the fridge, which only the lab guys have a key to (they go home at 3 pm), and the list went on. I had the most awful time restarting the IVs, and I had to prick one woman about 5 times before I got a good vein.

I didn't finish giving out the six o'clock medications until 10 pm, at which point I began to give the nine o'clock meds. By the time I finished those, it was 11:30 pm and I figured I might as well go straight into giving midnight medications. Needless to say, at that point I was so tired, physically and emotionally. But I finished the meds and was able to get some sleep between 2 am and 4 am, when I began the morning medications.

Here's the crazy thing. Throughout the whole night, inside I could feel the stress mounting; inside I felt like I wanted to burst into tears or just pack up my stuff and go home right then. Usually when I feel this way at work, it's easy for me to get irritated at the patients' family members who come up to me while I'm in the middle of doing something. I can't begin to count how many times I'll have someone come up to me while I'm starting an IV or drawing up some medication and say, "The water's finished," or "The water's stopped," or "S'il vous plait, j'ai te besoin (Please, I need you)." And when they do this, it's difficult for me to be patient and not snap at them. But last night, despite my inner turmoil, I was surprisingly calm, polite, and helpful. I astonished myself; and I am pretty sure I can credit it to my many prayers that I sent up before and during work for God to give me patience and get me through the night.

In fact, every once in a while, while I was walking somewhere to give a med or find a patient's family member, I would send up a quick prayer, "God, please don't leave me. Please, just help me through this night." It honestly didn't give me much peace. It didn't seem to make me feel any better inside, but I know that God was with me and was keeping me calm.

When morning came, and I was busying myself with giving out meds and taking vital signs, I was thinking about how tired I was and how glad I was that my shift was almost over. Then a tune popped into my head, and I started humming it to myself as I was working (the patients probably thought I was a little crazy). It's a simple song that I've learned in several languages since being here, and when it came into my head, I was actually singing it in Nangjere, not English.

As I walked about singing, "Kouma Koura, Kouma Koura, Kouma Koura, Kouma kong koura," I realized the significance, I realized why I was singing that song. You probably know the song in English: "God is so good, God is so good, God is so good, He's so good to me." I think God put that song into my head to remind me of how good He is. To remind me that He stayed with me all night and that He got me through the night, just as I prayed He would.